


Children of Melora

by Multifandom_damnation



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Allergies, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Reunions, Fictional Religion & Theology, Fjord (Critical Role) Has Issues, Frumpkin (Critical Role) is an Emotional Support Animal, Gen, Heart-to-Heart, POV Caduceus Clay, Team Bonding, Team as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-02
Updated: 2019-08-02
Packaged: 2020-07-29 06:53:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20077972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Multifandom_damnation/pseuds/Multifandom_damnation
Summary: Caleb shook Fjord awake as well and sent Caduceus a knowing look, and it took Caduceus a little while longer then was necessary to realize that maybe the Mighty Nein wanted him to talk to Fjord and that he absolutely didn't have the slightest idea of where to start.





	Children of Melora

**Author's Note:**

> I really needed to write this because I feel like Caduceus and Fjord have such a connection that I really need to write about it haha. I hope you like it because I enjoyed writing it, and I hope that translated haha.
> 
> Also, I had written the whole section on Frumpkin before I remembered that Fjord is allergic to cats BUT THEN I ALSO REMEMBERED THAT CALIANNA GAVE FJORD SOMETHING TO HELP WITH THEM!!! THANK YOU CALIANNA FOR MAKING MY DREAMS COME TRUE.

The Dust’s, at least in Caduceus’s humble opinion, was a lovely group of people that he was a little sad to say goodbye to, even if it were only for a short time.

They were a little hermitted, like he was before the Mighty Nein came to his home, and had seen his family and recent seasons, more recently than Caduceus himself, at least, so that gave him great faith that his family were still out there somewhere, continuing on their quest, the same on that Caduceus was also on with the Nein. They were faithful followers of both the Allhammer and the Wildmother, at least from what Caduceus could see, and even paid their respects to the Raven Queen, even though she did not ask for it. That in itself was enough to give them a good image in his mind.

Even as they were on their way back down the mountainside, he kept sneaking glances at the plumes of smoke spiralling into the sky and thinking about the Stone family in the south and the new connection between him and the long-lost members of his family, especially the ones he hadn’t seen in seasons.

But there was something much more pressing than Clay’s new-found connection between the Dust’s and the Stone’s and the surprising fact that his family had been through here seasons ago, and that was Fjord. Fjord and his sudden lack of patron and power and self-esteem.

It was unnerving to see a man so strong and so courageous walking with his shoulders hunched as if trying not to be seen and speaking as little as humanly possible. For the first time, Caduceus pitied him for the colour of his skin- the green stuck out like a sore thumb in the vast expanse of empty white snow that covered the mountains like soft powder, not very good at keeping attention off of him. The same went for Jester, Cad supposed, but she obviously didn’t feel the need to be hidden in plain sight at the moment. She had no reason to.

Caduceus wasn’t sure if Fjord would ever allow him to admit it out loud, or even to his face perhaps, but he was incredibly proud of his friend. Fjord had managed to do something so difficult that Caduceus hadn’t known anyone who had ever done it before and he did it all on his own.

Although Caduceus and the rest of the Nein were obviously very proud of their friend and pleased with his decision, it was very noticeable that Fjord did not feel that way at all, and somehow, Caduceus hated that in a way they were deriving pleasure from his pain.

Of course, he wasn’t the only one who noticed. Caleb kept sneaking glances at Fjord as they slowly made their way down the mountain and Beau would sometimes bump him in the shoulder when she saw him looking too miserable and he would have to give her some sort of lesion that she would then promptly ruin, though Caduceus thought it was mostly on propose, to give him something else to worry about that had nothing to do with water. Jester always had her eyes on him at some point, Cad had noticed, so she continuously chose just the right moment to flounce up to him with a laugh and a twinkle in her eye and a great big smile on her lips.

Honestly, Caduceus was rather proud of the way the Mighty Nein tried to take care of Fjord after such a tumultuous event. They were so very different than the people he had met at the Blooming Grove- back then, they hardly even cared about each other and it was the capture of their teammates and the death of their comrade that had turned them all around. They were very different than the people just before who had scrambled to offer Fjord all the excess power that he needed more than they did. They were learning. That was good.

It was still a long way to Uthodurn and despite how eager Caduceus was to get his- no, Fjord’s, it was always going to be Fjord’s, even if it was in his possession for now- sword fixed, he knew it was probably a good idea to bed down for the night.

Beau insisted on taking the first watch, Caleb volunteering for the second, and Caduceus thought it a good idea if he took the final one. He had much to think about and everyone else looked so exhausted that they were asleep on their feet. Maybe he shouldn’t have pushed them to traverse down the mountain so eagerly…

But they made no comment of it, and when Caleb woke him up for his watch, Caduceus went more than willingly. He was a little surprised to see Caleb also waking up Fjord, who winced a little and held his arm close to his chest like his self-inflicted wound still bothered him, and then went to take his own rest with Frumpkin by his side. Fjord joined Caduceus for his watch, and Cad didn’t have the heart to refuse.

While Caleb was getting comfortable in his bedroll, Caduceus saw a flash of blue from the corner of his eye and then Frumpkin was padding over to Fjord, rubbing his spine against his side, and it occurred to Caduceus that the others wanted him to talk to Fjord. Fjord sneezed and Caleb stiffened. Caduceus heard quiet swearing. “Go away, Frumpkin,” Fjord tried to push the cat away but Frumpkin was persistent. “You know I can’t pet you, I’m allergic.”

Caduceus wasn’t the smartest member of the Nein, but he did distinctly remember a gift given to him by someone he did not know. “Hey, didn’t you get something from your parcel?” he asked. “Jester said that it was supposed to help with allergies, right?”

Fjord’s eyes lit up and he went digging through his pouches. “Oh yeah, Calianna’s potpourri.”

“Yeah,” Caduceus agreed, settling back. “That stuff. Maybe that’ll help?”

A little reluctantly, Fjord brought the mixture to his nose and took a long, tentative sniff and after a few moments, he stopped sneezing and allowed Frumpkin to jump up into his lap. “Huh,” he said. “I’ve never actually pet Frumpkin before. It’s nice. I can see the appeal and why the girls always go crazy.”

Smiling, Caduceus reached over and rubbed Frumpkin behind his ears and the cat purred in thanks. “It’s very calming.” He said. “Nice to take your mind off of things. Sometimes, when Nott starts to panic and does the things that she does, Frumpkin jumps onto her lap and distracts her. It’s nice to know that this group has something like that, knowing what we do.”

For a few long moments, they were silent. Fjord pet Frumpkin with an easy, far-away expression and Caduceus kept an eye out on the surroundings and considered brewing some tea, but Fjord spoke before Cad had the chance to voice his thoughts. “I never got to thank you properly,” he said very quietly, so quietly that if weren’t for Caduceus’s very strong hearing, he wouldn’t have heard it at all. “For helping me out last night.”

“Well,” Caduceus said slowly, the idea of a nice warm, soothing cup of tea growing more and more appealing. “I couldn’t just sit there and let you bleed out through the night.”

That startled a laugh out of Fjord, which Caduceus was silently pleased with. “I’m not talking about that, though I am grateful for you keeping my sorry ass alive. But uh… I’m glad I woke you first. You made it easier to cope with, at least for the first few moments until the shock wore off.”

“Oh,” Caduceus beamed, always happy to help. “No worries. It was quite literally the least I could do.”

Fjord chuckled and turned his attention back to the very insistent cat in his lap. If he was being honest, Caduceus thought that it was very difficult to listen to Fjord speak. He was so used to his voice as Caduceus was presented it so very long ago and every moment since then that his new accent- new? Old? Original? True? Cad wasn’t too sure- but if it made Fjord more comfortable, then Caduceus was happy to indulge him. He would get used to it, eventually. He would never mention it to his face, of course, especially after Fjord had to clearly mentioned how nobody listened to him before he took on the persona of his captain, which was he adopted the accent in the first place. It was all very confusing.

“Uh,” Caduceus said awkwardly, hating to break the peaceful silence inside Caleb’s little bubble, and Fjord glanced up from petting Frumpkin, his nose a little red. “Would you like some tea?”

“No, it’s alright,” Fjord said, bringing Calianna’s gift back to his nose. “But feel free to make yourself a cup.”

Caduceus brewed a doubled serving, just in case.

Sighing, Fjord ran his nails behind Frumpkin’s ears, and the cat rubbed his head into his hand. He looked so at peace that Caduceus was honestly a little surprised to see it, especially after the kind of night he just had. “You know, it’s strange,” he said and Caduceus looked up from where he was watching the tea bubble. “When it happened, I was so desperate to have my magic, so desperate to be useful to the group, that I would actually hurt myself like I did in order to get it back. It didn’t happen, of course, I don’t know what I expected. But now… I just feel empty, in a good kind of way. Like a numbness inside me, an invisible weight that was weighing me down is all gone and now I’m all that’s left. You know?”

“Some people say guilt feels like that,” Caduceus said, focusing on the tea instead of Fjord’s too open face. “But yes, I believe I do. Is that emptiness… part of the reason why you stopped imitating your former captain?”

“It doesn’t really make that much sense, to be honest,” Fjord continued. “I thought that maybe if I imitated Vandren, made him a part of myself, then maybe I could have people treat me with the same respect and decency that they gave him. And I guess he meant so much to me, I just felt like I had to return the favour and honour his memory any way I could. But Jester sent him a message for me today, and he didn’t seem like he was looking for me, or even missed me, so I guess I realized that there was no need to copy a man who hadn’t thought about me in years. So when the magic was gone and I no longer felt tethered to Uk'otoa, I felt like... I don’t know. Me gaining my magic and that sword was the beginning of me pretending to be Vandren. Now that I don’t have either of those things anymore… I don’t feel the need to keep pretending. Now I’m just the man I was before all the magic.”

Beaming, Caduceus poured two cups of steaming tea, something warm in such a cold environment, and placed one in front of Fjord. Frumpkin had now settled in his lap, apparently sick of all the scratching, and closed his eyes to sleep. Fjord wrapped both hands around the mug but did not drink. “Well, I’m very glad to hear it. I’m pleased that you have found some sort of peace, even if it is fleeting.”

Fjord flicked his tongue over his tusks for a moment, starting now to peak out over the edges of his lips, and Caduceus wondered if he would start picking at them again now that he was no longer pretending to be Vandren. Reverting back to who he was before. “I felt her, you know. In the cavern, when I threw the sword into the molten iron. Within the panic, I felt… a peace, a calm that wasn’t my own. I warmth that didn’t come from the forges. I’m not too sure, because I haven’t really had any positive experiences with deities, but I’m pretty sure it was from her.”

Caduceus felt and excitement that he didn’t originally think he would be experiencing tonight. “Oh yeah? That’s great,” he laughed, trying not to wake the others. “I’m glad to hear it. And how did that make you feel?”

“Good,” Fjord laughed. “So fucking good, you have no idea. I’ve been in the cold for so long I’d almost forgotten what it was like to feel warm and loved and safe. It felt heaven, really.”

“Well,” Caduceus winked. “She isn’t called the Wild_mother_ for nothing.”

The deep, genuine belly-laugh that burst out of Fjord like a complete accident reminded Caduceus so much of himself that he was momentarily flattered. Maybe Vandren wasn’t the only person Fjord had taken personality traits from. Although, maybe it was just wishful thinking. “You know…” Fjord began, looking out at the faint glowing lights from the mountain forge the distance. “There’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot recently and I wanted to run it by you.”

Using one hand to wave Fjord on, Caduceus took a sip of his tea and nodded his head eagerly. “Of course, go on. I’m all ears. I mean, I'm mostly ears, as Nott would say. They are apparently… very large.”

Smiling, Fjord looked like he was mulling the words over in his mouth before he finally decided to say them. “I think that I might… try and follow in your footsteps by serving the Wildmother. I meant what I said before. You inspire me. And I’ve seen what she does for you and what she could maybe do for me and really… anything would be better then what I’ve had already.” He looked at Caduceus with such a hopeful expression that Caduceus wouldn’t have had the heart to refuse even if he wanted to. “What do you say? Would you… be alright with that?”

Deep inside his chest, Caduceus felt a flutter of pleasure that wasn’t entirely his own. He was glad that the Wildmother seemed to approve. “I don’t quite think I’ve ever heard a better idea come from your mouth in the whole time I’ve known you.”

Fjord seemed to blush and look away, back down at the cat in his lap and the quickly cooling teacup in his fingers. “You uh… you wouldn’t mind?”

“Why would I mind?” Caduceus laughed, slightly confused. “I have no control over who worships the Wildmother and honestly, that’s the way I like it. If you want to follow her, then be my guest. The more the merrier, I say.” He smiled. “You can never have too many followers.”

“Oh,” Fjord sighed, relieved and smiling. Caduceus was glad to see it. “Oh good. Thank fuck. You have… no idea how glad I am to hear you say that. I’ve been so worried this whole time about what you might say… I don’t know why though, thinking back on it.”

Caduceus cocked his head to the side and finished the rest of his tea. “Worried? About what I would say? Don’t be ridiculous- I think that’s a wonderful idea.” Caduceus’s put his empty teacup to the side as he looked at Fjord with an incredulous expression. “Do you honestly think so lowly of yourself that you thought I would think the same way?”

Gulping, Fjord reached a hand to his head and tugged at his hair before moving it to the back of his neck. “I uh, I suppose so. I guess it’s just something I’ve been so used to, especially before I was imitating Vandren, that now I just expect it. Even from you, which is… ridiculous.”

“Well,” Caduceus frowned. “I suppose that’s just one of the many things we’ll have to try and change for you then.”

“Yeah,” Fjord chuckled, “I guess so.”

For a moment, there was a comfortable silence between them. Caduceus was so lot in his thoughts, watching the stars slowly blink out over the horizon and the sun rise to paint the sky a kaleidoscope of colours that he almost didn’t notice Fjord struggling to stay awake. “Oh, Fjord,” Caduceus blinked. “Why don’t you get some more sleep? We’ve had a long day and yours have been even longer, considering you didn’t sleep the night before. Take a little longer. I’ll wake you when Caleb starts to ask for his cat back.”

Yawning, Fjord nodded and in his lap, Frumpkin made a purring sound deep in his chest, stretched, and padded towards Caleb where he fell asleep at the human’s head. “Yeah, I think you’re right Caddy. Good idea.” Reaching towards his pouch, Fjord pulled out a bottle of whisky that Caduceus didn’t remember him ever purchasing. He pulled the cork with a pop, poured a little into his now very cold cup of tea and swallowed it all in one gulp. Caduceus was left watching him, a little shocked. “Well, goodnight again, I guess. Wake me when you need me.”

He handed the empty cup back to Caduceus and crawled his way over to his bedroll where he promptly passed out face-first without waiting for a reply. Subconsciously, Jester’s tail coiled around his leg. “Sure,” Caduceus laughed quietly into the silence, his own little reply. “No problem.”

In the dark, Caduceus caught the wild glint of cat eyes staring right at him, unblinking, and he reached his long arm over to rub the cat between the ears. Frumpkin purred in pleasure. “It’s all going to be alright, Frumpkin,” he sighed, eyes still on the sun lightening up the darkened sky. “It will be. I just know it. And if it doesn’t get better on its own… well. I guess I’ll just have to make it get better.”

Somewhere out there, Caduceus had a family who was on the same quest he was, who was searching for a cure, who was hopefully missing him just as he missed them. A little part of him was disappointed by not seeing his family at the kiln, taking temporary resident with the Dust’s, but at the same time, he relieved to know that they were still out there, looking- and that they hadn’t given up hope like he had originally thought.

And Fjord would be alright. Caduceus knew it, in his heart of hearts, that he would get through it. Caduceus would mend his sword in Uthodurn and he would figure out how to live again without the influence of the vile serpent. He would follow the Wildmother, if that was what he chose, and she would guide him towards the light. He would gain new magic that he so desired, but pure and honest and so much warmer than anything he ever had before. Fjord would be alright.

“When the sun rises,” Caduceus recited softly to himself, watching the fading stars. “the darkness falls, and when the stars run, the children laugh again. The goddess breaths a song of kindness and the world bends to her call. And in the morning, when the goddess wakes and the darkness flees and he eyes are wide upon you, the day will be bright, and you will be happy, and learn to love again.”

Caduceus felt warm, and he could only hope that Fjord felt the same way.

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE, SOMEONE, TELL ME IF HERMITTED IS A WORD AND IF NOT HOW DO I FIX THAT SECOND SENTENCE


End file.
